I Thought I Was Fine.Then I Blacked Out.

A Freediving Story About Control, Mistakes, and Blackout at Depth

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Anthony Feoutis

AIDA & Molchanovs Instructor Trainer

He is the founder of The Depth Collector and VD Freediving Taiwan. With over a decade of experience, he focuses on solving real-world freediving problems, from equalization to depth adaptation, using practical, field-tested methods.

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I was 10 meters below the surface. The line had disappeared. I was lost in the blue. Alone. I remember it clearly. My heart squeezed every drop of fear out of my chest. Freediving blackouts don’t come from nowhere. They come from small mistakes that stack until control is gone.

From Instructor to Beginner Again

At that time, I was a proud Apnea Total instructor. I had been for three years. I had moved to Taiwan with my girlfriend, now my wife, to open our freediving school. Saying that Apnea Total was unknown in Taiwan would be an understatement. In a country that values diplomas and structured systems, being an instructor in a system with no strict requirements was difficult. So we made a decision. We crossed over to the new and rapidly growing system in town: Molchanovs.

A New System, A Blind Spot

It was the beginning of this education system. We were excited and proud to be part of it. We packed everything and moved to Bali to train and pass the requirements. At that time, they were harder than they are now, but we were ready. The pool sessions went well. I never really enjoyed the pool. I never understood the appeal, but I pushed through. My DNF was far from perfect, but it met the standard. Depth was different. That was always my playground. Except for one discipline: Constant Weight No Fins (CNF). I had never trained for it. I had never structured a dive around it. I had no real understanding of it. The Instructor Trainer was supportive. He showed me the fundamentals. We practiced just enough so I would not look completely lost. That was the mistake.

Where It Went Wrong

The line was set at 45 meters. I completed my CWTB and FIM dives comfortably. Then I was told I could keep practicing CNF to prepare for the 35-meter requirement the next day. That is where the mistakes started to stack. I had been told clearly not to dive deep. But in that moment, I thought: The line is at 45. I can just go to 35 and be done with it. Easy. That thought cost me everything.

The Dive That Led to a Blackout

I filled my lungs and started the descent. I moved fast. Too fast. Using far too much power. I checked my watch. 28 meters. Almost there. A few more strokes. I could feel the speed. The ocean swallowing me. I looked again. 42 meters. Fuck. I’m going to black out. I pulled hard, twice, closed my eyes, and turned up. My technique was gone. My heart was racing. Everything was driven by fear. I remember repeating: Don’t black out. Please. Not now. I kept swimming. Then something changed. It became easy. Too easy.

Lost in the Blue

I opened my eyes. I was around 10 meters below the surface. The line was gone. I was lost in the blue. Alone. No safety diver. No reference. No structure. Just open water. I stopped. Turned right. Left. Then the line appeared again, right in front of me. And then… nothing.

What a Freediving Blackout Feels Like

The next thing I remember, I was on the buoy. Breathing. Mask on my head. Screaming: “Yeeeaaah! I did it!” I looked at my wife. “Uhh… no,” she said. “You blacked out.” That moment stays with you. Because you don’t feel it coming the way you expect. Because your brain tells you everything is fine, right before it shuts down.

The Real Cause of My Blackout

At first, I was surprised. Then I felt defeated. I pretended it was not a big deal. But it was. The next day, I had to do it again. The dive, not the blackout. And this time, I was afraid. My wife told me it was a small blackout, nothing to worry about. Just a few seconds. Years later, when I told that story to our students, she admitted she had lied. It wasn’t small at all. But it didn’t matter. I still had to go back down. This time, I understood. The line was set at 35 meters. I set an alarm to start my freefall. And I realized something that changed the way I dive forever: I didn’t black out because I went deep. I blacked out because I had no control.

Freediving Lessons: Control Over Depth

This is where most freedivers get it wrong. It’s not depth that breaks you. It’s lack of structure. Lack of preparation. Lack of control. I was strong enough. Experienced enough. But I wasn’t disciplined enough in that moment. And in freediving, that’s all it takes.

The Rule I Never Broke Again

I made a promise that day. Never again.

• No unprepared depth

• No open line

• No guessing

  
  

Understand the dive. Control the dive. Be a freediver. Not a risk taker.

The Importance of Structured Training

Structured training is essential for every freediver. It helps you build confidence and skill. When you have a plan, you can focus on your technique and safety. This approach allows you to dive deeper while minimizing risks.

Setting Goals and Tracking Progress

Setting clear goals is another vital aspect of structured training. Whether you aim to improve your depth, technique, or breath-hold time, having specific targets keeps you motivated. Tracking your progress helps you see how far you've come. It also highlights areas that need improvement.

The Role of Safety in Freediving

Safety should always be a top priority. This means diving with a buddy, using proper equipment, and knowing your limits. Always communicate with your dive partner about your plans and signals. This ensures you both stay safe and aware during your dives.

Mindfulness and Mental Preparation

Freediving is as much a mental challenge as it is a physical one. Practicing mindfulness can help you stay calm and focused underwater. Techniques like visualization can prepare you for the dive ahead. Picture yourself executing the dive perfectly. This mental rehearsal can boost your confidence and performance.

Learning from Mistakes

Every freediver makes mistakes. The key is to learn from them. Reflect on your experiences and identify what went wrong. This will help you avoid similar situations in the future. Remember, growth comes from overcoming challenges.

Building a Supportive Community

Surrounding yourself with a supportive community can enhance your freediving journey. Share experiences, tips, and encouragement with fellow divers. This camaraderie fosters growth and helps you stay motivated.

Conclusion: Embrace the Journey

Freediving is a beautiful journey filled with ups and downs. Embrace every moment, learn from your experiences, and strive for improvement. With structured training, a focus on safety, and a supportive community, you can master your skills and explore greater depths. Remember, it's not just about the depth; it's about the journey you take to get there.